I never break rules!

sunshineWe all know Sunshine, a beautiful soul, always willing to help and never asking for anything in exchange, offering Watsu and not even asking for money, always smiling, just a perfect ohana member never breaking any rules. How true is this statement? We asked him one evening while talking about breaking rules. ‘I’ve never broken any rules’ said Sunshine. That made us think, how is that possible? We all know rules are meant to be broken and we were all there, but apparently not Sunshine. We decided to investigate this matter further. We hired a private detective who along with In Touch  Kalarazzi followed Sunshine to discover the truth. And here are our findings:

  1. We all know Kalani’s speed limit is 5 MPH. And here we see Sunshine speeding like crazy, not looking around, scaring all pedestrians. We quickly measured the speed:  5MPH! Sunshine shame on you!
  1. Kalani focuses on wellness and quiet hours are designed so everybody can get enough beauty sleep, but not Sunshine. Do you want to know what Sunshine is doing at night? He shared his secret with us – he plays with cats! If you hear meowing and hissing in the middle of the night and you can not sleep, now you know why!
  2. We don’t like standing in line, especially when we are hungry. We want our food now! But we know, in order to get our food we have to wait in line. Of course not Sunshine! Just watch him! He comes out of nowhere and starts a conversation with whoever is in front. He is all happy, shiny, smily, he starts offering rides to Krishna or Kirtan, Watsu session etc. and whoever is in the front of the line feels like Sunshine was there before.
  3. graffitiYou probably think he works hard, painting our facilities, but not exactly. We found him walking around and tagging A-frames with spray paint!
  4. And do you know why he has a bed in his van? He smuggles illegal immigrants from the mainland United States, and from its NATO allies who want to run away from Donald Trump and find a place in Kalani, but they don’t want to volunteer.
  1. All the missing cups and dishes from the lanai? Take a look in Sunshine’s van. You will find them all there.

We appreciate and admire Sunshine for all he does for us, but as we have discovered, he is not as perfect as he seems. He is human just like the rest of us, and breaks the rules too. He breaks a lot of them- probably more than the rest of us, actually, but that’s OK Sunshine, we still love you!


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