Galen is an Alien

galenWe didn’t notice anything particularly strange about Galen right away. Nobody did. He blended in with the humans of the volunteer community just fine.  He has always maintained a good work ethic, a fun and engaging personality, a healthy appetite for the things humans eat, and a substantial amount of book learning and intelligence. As a conversationalist, he has always held his own and had plenty of interesting things to say. This is how he was able to keep the secret of his true identity safe for so long. But all that changed on the day of the inauguration ceremony for Pete, our new Guru, as we reported in our last issue. It was then that the horrifying truth about Galen came out. It was then that he was revealed to be an alien from some far off world elsewhere in the galaxy.

galen 2We were in the INTWK editorial office, still feeling high from the experience of the inauguration ceremony, still reveling in the glory of the blessings our new Guru had bestowed upon the community and still excited for what having Pete as our Guru will mean to us all. We knew we had to rush the new issue of In Touch while the community was still riding this wave of euphoria and ecstasy.  So, it was while we were going over the copious pictures of Pete’s inauguration ceremony to decide which of the many we should include in the issue that we discovered the shocking truth about Galen.

As we looked at the pictures, we noticed a couple of things. First of all, we noticed that Pete’s court was thrilled to honor him by bowing to him and hoisting him high in the air. The looks on their faces were that of rapture. They felt the awe that Pete inspired. They felt it and they honored it. They gave Pete the respect and adoration he deserved. They were each in a state of oneness and grace. Then we noticed Galen in these pictures.  Something was different about him. There was no oneness. There was no grace. There was no respect or adoration. As the others in the court gave Pete attention and hoisted him in the air, Galen stood apart eating toast.

galen 3Eating toast! At a celebration to inaugurate a new Guru! He’s eating toast! Our first thought was to admonish him and shun him for this egregious lack of etiquette. But after our anger subsided, we decided not to jump to conclusions and to delve deeper into the situation and investigate what the cause of this may be.

The first thing we did was consult one of the many trusted psychics of Kalani and see if they had any insights. What she told us shocked us! After fluttering her eyes and making “whoop whoop” noises, she shouted “He’s an alien! He’s here to understand human ways and learn Hawaiian protocol!”

We looked at each other and nodded our heads. It all made sense now. Galen is an alien. Yes! Of course! Only an alien would be so distant and eating toast at a ceremony of such significance. With this new understanding, we forgave Galen and began to appreciate him in a new way. Whatever we can do to help him understand human ways and Hawaiian protocol so that he can enlighten those of his home planet, we are happy to do so, and we encourage all our readers to do the same.

 Galen’s Challenges with Being Human

Galen struggled to appear human. He was always observing humans behaviour. People laughing, smiling, crying. He was always there looking deeply  and recording. He mostly did a good job, but there were times when he slipped up and it was obvious that he was not. Take for example the time he stepped on a sea urchin and had several sea urchin quivers embedded in his foot. Everybody assumed that it was an unfortunate accident, but no. That was not the case. In reality, he got the sea urchin confused with a shoe. While in the water, he suddenly realized there was nothing on his feet. It clicked in his mind, “Humans wear something on their feet!” forgetting that humans don’t always wear anything on their feet in the water. He felt though, that if he is going to pass as human, he better do as humans do and put something on his feet quickly. That is when he saw what he thought to be a pair of shoes underwater, so he tried to shove his foot into it. But it wasn’t a shoe, as he quickly found out. It was a sea urchin, and he paid the price for shoving his foot in it. It was a painful lesson, but it was not for nothing. Nobody actually noticed or even cared if Galan wore shoes or not, but he did learn about human sympathy. As he struggled with the pain and with the inconvenience of hobbling on crutches, everybody felt sorry for him and wanted to help him. So, he got a lot of attention and learned a valuable lesson on human kindness that he can include in his report back on his home planet.


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