A HUI HOU It’s sad to see our ‘ohana leave. Though we will miss you all dearly, we know this is not ‘goodbye’ but rather ‘until we meet again’’ and look forward to the day we do! Mahalo for your aloha spirit! Key-lei, Michael, Kristen, Galen, Nabil, Shauni, Lauren and Yuka, safe travels and best to you all on your new adventures! WELINA MAI  Some people had to go so others could come. Welcome to our new super volunteers Melisa, Tucker, Isaiah, BreAna, Victoriya, Daniel, LaTasha, Mary and Beatrice! Continue reading A HUI HOU / WELINA MAI #13

Where is your country and what is the official language? Cuba. The language is Cubanese. What is a traditional food from your country? I’m partial to bananas, cheese and olives seasoned with the tears of the baboons. What was the biggest culture shock you’ve experienced at Kalani? I was surprised by the lack of respect and the hatred for your president. In Cuba, we cherish our leader. In every home, there is a picture of him hanging above their hearths and altars. He is a guru to the Cuban people. What do you like most about your culture? Hunting baboons … Continue reading In Touch with a different culture: Cody

One day we found a picture in our inbox- an origami towel in a shape of an elephant and the picture was crossed. What is behind it and who is behind it? No signature, no note just a picture. No origami elephants?  We don’t do origami towels at Kalani and we don’t even have elephants.  We thought maybe this is a new idea in Housekeeping to create origami and obviously someone doesn’t like that idea. We sent our undercover secret service agents to Housekeeping to investigate and we got nothing. Housekeeping didn’t know anything about origami towels; they are so … Continue reading Fire ant solution

Everybody is talking about Kalani Renewal and everybody has the wrong idea on what is going on. But we know and we want to share with you our findings. Be ready for anything, literally. Kalani will be the best educational center ever. We will all start from zero so whatever you know just forget about it. You will learn many new skills over the years. Here is the plan. At the beginning of New Year we will do a lottery, two lotteries to be exact: one for work assignment and one for housing assignment. So you better start talking to … Continue reading Kalani Renewal

We didn’t notice anything particularly strange about Galen right away. Nobody did. He blended in with the humans of the volunteer community just fine.  He has always maintained a good work ethic, a fun and engaging personality, a healthy appetite for the things humans eat, and a substantial amount of book learning and intelligence. As a conversationalist, he has always held his own and had plenty of interesting things to say. This is how he was able to keep the secret of his true identity safe for so long. But all that changed on the day of the inauguration ceremony … Continue reading Galen is an Alien

Inspired by the classic film, Cool Hand Luke, in which rule breakers at a sadistically run prison farm in the south are made to spend a night in a tight and cramped metal box in the middle of the prison yard, Kalani will as part of its renewal, institute a similar punishment for its rule breakers. One of the now defunct mini vans will be revamped and repurposed as a punishment chamber to be parked in the middle of E ho mei Village and serve as “The Box.” Rule breakers will be locked in this rat and fire ant infested … Continue reading Spend a Night in The Box Kalani Style

This past year, the volunteer office implemented a new procedure by which volunteers can speak their mind and be heard about anything that is on their mind concerning their stay at Kalani, including how they feel about the department they work in and the shift leaders and managers. This was intended to be completely confidential. The information provided by the volunteers was always meant to stay within the confine of the volunteer office, disseminated to department leaders only as anonymous feedback. This was supposed to be a safe way for volunteers to speak what is on their mind without fear … Continue reading Horticulture spying and taping VO phones

Sometimes people come to Kalani who are not who they seem to be. The Volunteer Office cannot run a background check on everybody, so they trust that they are who they say they are. If an applicant claims to be a simple and humble farm worker from Hungary, we just assume that that is what they are. There is no reason to assume that they are really the heir to the Hungarian Throne, which was the case with a recent volunteer, Zoltan. Zoltan, as you may recall from a previous issue was imprisoned in Hale 2, what was then a … Continue reading Kalani’s Hidden Treasure